Check out some of the easiest ways of avoiding ‘mom burnout’!
As a mom of a toddler, my life is full of drama. There are bitter feelings caused by not getting what one wants, and then there are moments packed with unlimited consolation. Our mornings start with- why a bowl full of cornflakes is meant to be eaten and not bathed with. Afternoons pretty much go into explaining why chewing on teddy’s hair isn’t all that nice. The worst is that half-an-hour slot just before the nap-time. It is hard to explain why switching on the heater at 42 degree Celsius outside can throw us in a fit. It is even harder to explain why somethings are meant to be switched off. No! Wait, when he wants it switched on, it is switched on and when it is on, he cries because he wanted it the other way!
So, mommies, let me tell you now that if you are planning to have a baby or about to deliver, just be prepared for one thing. It is called ‘burn-out’. And, no! ‘Mommy burn-out’ is NO fun.
The last six months have been extremely heavy on me. I was constantly snapping at my ‘monster’ toddlo and the ‘over-smart’ husband. I started forgetting things. Things I said and later denied of having said. I was crawling into bed really late at night and staying awake through at least 3 out of 7. The worst hit when my son started looking for others to play with. I was simply not paying attention to his needs. One day I asked him to sit and play with me and he muttered something strange. A line that our house was getting too used to- “Not now, some other time please”. That’s when the guilt entered the scene.
Forget the initial few days, weeks or months of fatigue that one typically gets as soon as she becomes a mother, in fact, the days (and nights) take a massive toll the minute your child hits the toddler stage. I remember being so tired from the endless diaper change, feeding sessions and the concept of ‘entertain your baby’ that I had almost become a zombie. But, the repercussion of the actual burn out began to hit only now when the diapers were replaced by potty-training, feeding was no more limited to the good old boobies. It was now about deciding and preparing a proper kids-friendly menu and the running around a wild child for the sake of entertainment wasn’t enough.
One day, I decided enough is enough! Here how I tried to tackle the burn-out issue:
1. Saying ‘No’ is the new Yes!: Most of the times, the burn-out happens when we are trying to achieve a lot and want to keep them all happy. I would request you to stop committing to too many responsibilities. Trust me; you won’t look bad if you say ‘NO’ for a change! No, you can’t prepare a meal tonight cause you have had the worst day ever. No, you can’t do the laundry today because your arms are hurting like crazy. So, mommas- start practicing the word “No”!
2. Treat yourself to a nice break: Soak yourself in the joy of tub-bathing with all the aromatic oils and gels. Relax by making a chamomile tea towards the end of the day. Go, grab a copy of the latest book by your favorite author and read it whenever you get time. Take Sundays off and indulge in some retail-therapy. Hit the gym or order in the best-selling pizza on the menu, follow it up with a nap on Saturday. Ask your hubby to take charge of the house for one day of the week. Life is made of such small and simple joys too. You don’t need to plan something extremely major. Time doesn’t wait. Just by telling yourself that you need a break will not solve the issue.
3. It’s okay to give up at times-Focus on finding joy: Now, this was the hardest for me. I tend to over-do. I would set very high goals for myself. And this lead to a TOTAL burn-out. You know, it’s good to be hard-working, however at times you can get unrealistic and that can cause you A LOT of stress. I am not saying that you become a hippie and let your kids run around wild! All I am saying is that you got to go easy on yourself and your family. Don’t hold yourself up or lose your mind if your child threw up his lunch or you weren’t able to do grocery shopping that day. Such minor hiccups are nothing in front of the art of making beautiful memories that are going to last a lifetime. I repeat- ‘Don’t nail yourself to the wall with every mistake you make!’ Find joys in simple things.
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