Hug it out!

by Vaishali Sudan Sharma updated on January 6, 2015

‘Hug it out’ means a lot to me and here is hoping that instead of holding yourself guilty for something that wasn’t completely your fault, you might want to do the same!

Mom and Brat H have been unwell for the past few days. We have got cold and the virus is in the air. So, currently we are in the ‘let’s hug it out’ mode.

Just looking at his little face, all dull because of fever and constant sneezing makes me feel so low. Am I the real culprit? Have I been responsible for his state? I should have been more careful. I should have been able to take better care of him. 

Hug it out 01

I bet as parents, we feel this way all the time. We hold ourselves accountable for all that our kids have to go through at some point or the other. The procrastination starts exactly from this very stage and it has no validity period. We blame ourselves right from when the baby is born and it goes on and on. Yes, even when the ‘baby’ is in his/her 50s and we are nearly on our way out, we continue to blame ourselves. Why did they fall sick? Why did they not wash their hands before eating? Why did they not hug me before their bedtime? Why did they not listen to us before deciding on the university? Why did they have to settle down with that man/woman? Why did they make such poor decisions? Why did they not invite us for holidays? Why did they not call to wish us?

By blaming ourselves and living in guilt, we are only making it worse. Instead of keeping quiet and holding ourselves liable, we should rather talk it out. Infact, we must hug it out.

“Dear Son/daughter, I feel that I wasn’t emotionally available for you the other day, I am sorry, here is a hug for I mean it and am truly unhappy for whatever happened.” 

Now, how difficult was that?!

Hug it out 02

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7 thoughts on “Hug it out!

  1. I loved the statement – ‘dear son/daughter, I feel I wasnt emotionally available the other day. I am sorry , here is a hug for I mean it and am truly unhappy for whatever happened’. I wrote it here word by word in order to internalise it.
    I often wonder how do you manage to write, design and post such great stuff being the mom of a small baby. Commendable would be the right adjective for your effort. Get well soon….both of you.

    • Just a lot of cutting down on ‘my time’ but feels really good to write. I am just hoping that one day Brat H goes through this and says ‘Wow! Mum, all this..for me! I love you’. I love your blog too, and the most recent post ‘In my Garden’..pretty sweet 🙂

  2. makes so much sense n so beautifully written! Brat H as you call him will have a great time reading all these when he grows up!

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