by Suditsha Sanyal
It is a challenge to manage kids without uttering “no” at all times. But, here is something this mom found out. Now the number of fights between her children has reduced considerably
On a recent visit to Bangalore, I came across a very unique and interesting challenge – the #YesChallenge that is part of the #YesMom Movement. Yes, this piqued my interest too and I’m amazed to see my sister following this challenge. She showed me a video and I must admit that it was quite impressive and exciting.
So, let me tell you something about this challenge. And, you can also try to implement or follow this challenge too. In this challenge, you just have to use the word “yes” and will have to refrain from using the word “no” when communicating with your child.
My sister tried this for a week and it was quite a success. So, I decided to take it up too and it actually did wonders! Not only was it helpful in spreading positivity but seemingly it helped in reducing the sibling fights that used to take place between my two daughters as well!
I really can’t comment on the science behind this as to how it really works, but as far as my understanding goes -when we say “yes” to the child, his/her brain reacts and starts perceiving things in a positive and optimistic manner. Moreover, there is no build-up of aggression which generally occurs when we always discourage or keep on saying “no” to our kids.
“No”- this two letter word has a very big and negative impact on one’s psyche. You can relate this word to negativity, pessimism, discouragement, anger and so on and so forth. As compared to adults, a child interprets the word “no” in a very different manner. To cite an example, if you tell a child not to eat food from outside and eat it from their own lunch box, the child’s impressionable mind may presume that you are discouraging him/her from sharing food with others.
To be protective towards your child is innately a motherly instinct and there is absolutely nothing wrong in that, but overdoing it can have a negative impact as well. Children are immature and are at times confused, and restricting their thoughts and actions can sometimes lead to behavioral imbalance. Therefore, it is imperative on the parents’ part to strike and maintain a right balance which ensures a balanced and stable personality development of the kid.
Having said that, it is also very important at times to say “no” to a child for certain things. Disciplining a child, without using the word “no” requires a lot of skill and is quite a challenge in itself.
I tried really hard, in the beginning, it was a challenge to manage both my kids without uttering “no” at all times. Let me share one small instance – a very common incident which perhaps happens in every household. Yes, the eternal fight between siblings over watching a particular channel of their choice. Both my daughters wanted to watch something different on the television at the same time. The elder one wanted to watch a movie while the younger one wanted to watch a cartoon show, and both of them were not willing to budge an inch. I made the elder one understand and eventually convinced her by saying that taking care of your younger sibling, keeping her happy and loving her will make you a good elder sister. Consequently, in one such instance, she made the younger one understand and convince the value of sharing her toys with her elder sister and friends and taking care and loving her elder sister. In previous fights, I would have just said a flat no to both of them and turned the TV off! But by saying yes and taken into account everyone’s point of view, we all found a show that we all enjoyed!
Sibling rivalry is inevitable but imparting values like sharing and caring helps in curbing sibling rivalry and also ensures a healthy loving bond between siblings. Yes, at times it becomes very hard to convince a child without being harsh and rude but that’s the essence and beauty of this challenge, right?
This movement has not only helped in shaping the behavior of my daughters but my husband says he saw a remarkable change in my behavior as well. I have become more calm and composed. Such is the power of the three letter word “Yes”. I have also said Yes to the brand that took this unique #YesMom initiative ActivKids Immuno Boosters. This a nutritional supplement for kids and comes in a tasty choco-bite format and helps build immunity in kids. I was quite surprised at this unique product. Coming from a company like Cipla I decided to give it a go. And guess what there was a fight between my daughters on this as well. Both wanted to have the product as they loved it. But the product comes in 2 different age-groups 4-6 years and 7+ years and I got each of them a separate pack. Being assured that their nutrient requirement is being completed through these choco-bites, I also feel a bit relaxed and more intent to say Yes to them
To all the moms out there, try and accept the #YesChallenge and join the Activ Kids Immuno Booster #YesMom movement. Head to this website to commence your journey to be a #YesMom. Believe me, you won’t regret it, you will see an immediate change in your kids’ and your life as well!