by Manali Desai
Parenting an angry child can be a tough task! Let’s take a look at 5 amazing ways to calm an angry one
Human beings are a complex web of emotions; love, happiness, sadness, etc. are part and parcel of our everyday life. Today, The Champa Tree delves deeper into the ways of handling one such strong emotion in a child. It’s that one emotion which is a bit difficult to deal with even as we grow up, grow mature and even when we grow old, managing it can be a problem. Yes, I am talking about the emotion we indicate with a red mark which in itself points towards its danger, which is anger.
“A moment of patience in a moment of anger saves hundreds of regrets.” Agree? We all have our good days and bad days and anger just proves we’re human. Sometimes taking out all that rage is necessary too. But that doesn’t hide the fact that anger does lead to loses. (Sometimes even monetary).
Growing up too can be frustrating, especially when you’re not capable of understanding your own emotions and how to deal with them. Hence, a child gets angry easily in comparison to us adults. This is where, we, as parents, need to show our love and understanding towards our little ones. If we react in the wrong way, it might lead to a lasting impression on their developing minds and who knows what the repercussions would be. Parenting an angry child is not an easy job, I am sure, and we hear so many parents complaining that “My child gets very angry”, but it’s not rocket science and these points could be helpful.
1. Talk it out: Confused about what to do with an angry child, talking about problems helps us adults too, why should it be any different for children then? Try to understand what triggered that emotion. It not only helps you understand the problem but will also buy time to abate their anger. They might calm down while talking it out.
2. Think like a child: It is very important to keep in mind that what angers and upsets us adults, is light years different from what would upset a child. So what might seem irrelevant to us might be important to them. Don’t ignore the problem just because it seems inconsequential to you.
3. Punish them for the behavior, not the emotion: It is indeed necessary to teach them to control their anger, but don’t be too harsh on them. Studies show that too much of harshness pushes children to behave even more negatively. The important thing is to teach them how to behave when they’re angry. Let’s say, they damage a property or lash out physically at someone in their anger, then punish them for the action, not for being angry. Next time around they’ll know to control their actions. This could well be your answer to the question how to discipline an angry child too.
4. Control your own anger in front of them: It is a known fact that children model the behavior of parents and the adults around them. If they have seen you arguing or talking loudly, it is very likely that they’ll do the same when they’re angry. So first teach yourself, and then only you’ll be able to teach them.
5. Pay attention to your physical reactions: Your body language and gestures speak leaps and bounds too. Even if you’re speaking calmly, but if your body is visibly twitching or say you impulsively lash out at them, they’ll not only notice and remember, but think that this is how anger is to be dealt with.
I am not saying that these are best ways to deal with an angry child and it might also be that you have better ways and ideas to deal with it. But, there’s something new to be learnt from every suggestion and experience. So, I hope these will help you out in dealing with a cranky child the next time around, even if in the smallest possible way. Let’s teach our children to be better in dealing with their emotions; after all we do see a lot of it being used negatively already.
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