This week, in our Real Moms Real Stories series, meet this traveling real mom – Trisha Das. A young mother to two girls, Trisha is a former flight attendant married really young and had both the girls before she turned 30. “To some, it might feel like I rushed it but if I was given another chance I wouldn’t do it any other way.”
Born and raised in a nuclear family that resided in a quiet town of Bhilai in Chattisgarh, Trisha owes her sense of independence to her parents. Married a Kannadiga from Bangalore, who she met while they were both flying for the same airline, Trisha has her own motherhood project she feels is a WIP.
Both my daughters were born in the Middle East. We now live in Asia and we plan on moving and changing counties until we can as we feel traveling and exposing kids to different cultures is the best way to learn.
Tell us a bit about the real story behind this real mom?
I am a happier person when I have work to look forward to. Since I gave up my globe-trotting career for my girls, I made them my own personal project and they are my work in progress. For me, every work that I do needs to be done with the best of my ability and for every little work, I like to put in my 100% effort with research and studies. So when I got pregnant I ended up reading numerous books and blogs over parenting, nutrition, music, and early education.
And here I’m sharing my experiences and what I have learned over the years as a millennial parent.
What’s something you always wanted to do and you didn’t and why didn’t you?
I am a person who loves to learn and experiment with things in life so I can’t think of too many things that I wanted to do but haven’t done yet. Having said that, yes I really wanted to learn to play the guitar. I’m very musically inclined and I love it when someone sings and additionally plays an instrument.
I haven’t learnt it yet but it’s on my list!
Where do you currently reside? What do you most enjoy about the place?
We live in Vietnam, the cosmopolitan culture, and just how safe this country is one thing I enjoy the most.
What do you miss the most about your own city/place you moved from?
We lived in Abudhabi for 8 years before we moved here. And I miss my friends from Abudhabi the most. They were like family and heart is where the family is.
What are the schools/education like, any particular suggestions?
They have great international schools here to choose from. From the British curriculum to IB you can take your pick.
Did your family have problems adjusting to their new home?
We didn’t have problems adjusting to this country as we have been living out of India for a while now.
What is like being a stay-at-home-mom? And what would you change?
I’m fortunate that I have an option to be a stay-at-home-mom at the moment and as much as I would love to go back to work, I’m enjoying the journey of motherhood and few early years of undivided attention with love and care that I can give to set the right foundation. They are growing up so fast and they are learning something new every minute I would not want to miss out on anything.
Although I would like to change the mindset of people when it comes to what they feel or think for stay-at-home-moms. It’s easy to judge but one needs to understand that being a mother is a full-time job with no vacations or time-offs. There is no escape, thankfully I do have a partner who gives me space and downtime by handling the kids and by being a hands-on dad. I get to go out for girls night and even on all girls’ vacation from time to time. I’m thankful.
They say it takes a village to raise a child- tell us something about your village?
Well, I am not sure if I completely agree with this statement. I have been living out of India and on my own, since I was 20, I eventually got married and have a nuclear family living abroad. Our family visits us from time to time but when it comes to my children, my husband and I are on our own. If two people make a village then I guess this is it.
Have you ever done something really impulsive and how did it go?
So when my younger daughter was 2.5 months old we took an all adults trip to Norway to see the northern lights. We left both the girls with their grandparents and flew with our friends to Norway for 12 days.
I was initially very skeptical about this decision but ‘Oh my god’ you have to do it to believe it yourself. I never thought an all-adult trip can make such a difference mentally and physically.
Taking a break from your mommy brain which is constantly multitasking and micromanaging at all times is great. It’s excellent to feel like you are only responsible for yourself. You only need to feed yourself. You can enjoy longer showers, eat hot food, take time to get ready. Read a book in peace and drink all the cocktails you want as you don’t have to wake up early the next day.
It’s better for our kids too because they get some time with grandparents and the pampering. And we come back with more love and patience as we end up missing them and appreciating them more.
Norway was our first and since then we have decided to take one every year and never looked back.
Was there something your parents did when you were a kid that you swore you would never do yourself?
I think times have changed and parenting has come a long way since then. And every generation of parents tries to do it better.
Although I love how hardworking my parents were and how much effort they put in to bring us up while managing working full time. We also have to realize that our generation from time to time tends to take the easy way out. Think of the time where mums had no screentime to rely on or no iPads and apps as an excuse to escape… Yes, it’s easy to always judge but sometimes things can be another way round too.
Check out her Instagram handle!